By Lady Chioma Lasbrey Njoku
Parenting or (child rearing) is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, and intellectual development of a child from infancy to adulthood. Parenting refers to the intricacies of raising a child and not exclusively for a biological relationship (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parenting).
Parenthood refers to the state of being a parent, and specifically the position, function, or standing of a parent (https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/parenthood)
Responsible Parenting refers to the duty of parents to ensure the proper upbringing of their children, especially within the critical period from birth to the age of twenty-one; twenty-one being the dusk of adolescence and the advent of full, ripe adulthood.
The duties that responsible parents perform include provision of basic need of:
1. Food
2. Clothing
3. Shelter
4. Education: Basic education is a fundamental human right of every child. Giving a child qualitative education is the greatest legacy parents bequeath their children.
5. Good home Training: Values, norms and ethics.
6. Positive concepts in the psyche, viz nurturing positive self-esteem in the child.
7. Safety & Security within and outside the home.
The social conditions of the family relate to and directly affects the conditions of the society, as the family is the nucleus of society and healthy families make a healthy society. The behavioural patterns of children are dependent on the extent their parents nurture and cater for them.
Outcomes in parenting refer to the expected results or expectations the society has concerning the children as they evolve into well meaning, responsible adults.
Expected outcomes emanate from parenting styles; developmental psychologist, Diana Baurmind identified three main parenting styles namely:
1.Authoritarian Parenting Style. This is very rigid, strict and patriarchal in nature. Decisions are solely taken by the father, and failure to abide by his decisions attracts severe punishment.
Outcome: Youth from this type of family display deviant behaviours in school towards teachers and peers.
2. Authoritative Parenting Style involves open communication between both parents and children or young adult. The authoritative parent listens more to the child(ren); they monitor the children instead of trying to rule their lives. They are assertive in rules, but still less restrictive. The authoritative parenting style is recommended as the best parenting style.
Outcome: Youth from such homes have sound communication skills, with good self-esteem, and are usually law abiding.
3. Permissive Parenting Style: Here, there is not much structure for parenting. There are often no strict set rules or guidelines for, and expectations of the children as parents often avoid conflict. In the face of misbehaviour, they are lenient.
Outcome: Children from such homes tend to display more negative behaviours at school.
4. Uninvolved Parenting Style: Parents in this group are emotionally absent and unavailable. They have no expectations of the child and regularly do not have communication with the child. Materially, they provide everything the child needs for survival, with little or no engagement.
Outcome: Children from such homes tend to be victims of other children’s deviant behaviour, and get involved in some socially deviant behaviour themselves. They also lack positive self-esteem.
For a sound, well-balanced and egalitarian society, therefore, where there is rule of law and respect for fundamental human rights, parents ought to do their very best in nurturing ‘the leaders of tomorrow’.
Lady Chioma Lasbrey Njoku
Civic Education Teacher. Ss2.
