Members of my generation relished popular James Bond movies and the movies of the martial arts maestro, Bruce Lee, in the 1980s. We savoured the endless stunts exhibited by Bond in such movies as: ‘The spy who loved me,’ ‘Dr No,’ and ‘Octopussy.’ But Lee’s unique martial arts’ skills animated us; as exemplified in his evergreen movies, like: ‘Enter the Dragon,’ ‘Fist of Fury,’ and ‘The way of the dragon.’ As students film shows in the refectory was one of the most eagerly anticipated activities in the school. They helped us to relieve the boredom of regimented school life that so much weighed down on us. The school authority always favoured Literature movies, especially the Shakespearean hue like: ‘Macbeth,’ ‘Romeo and Juliet’ and ‘Julius Caesar.’ But we found them very boring, and tasteless. Not even the famed oratory of Mac Anthony endeared us to the movie of Julius Caesar. Moreover, the romantic escapade between Romeo and Juliet that led to their tragic death sounded surreal to our consciousness. It was never realistic. It could be avant-garde, but we were cocksure that no female student in Owerri Girls Secondary School or even neighbouring Federal Government Girls College, would likely commit suicide for the sake of her troubled love affair with an Ogssian knight in shining armour! We, therefore, justifiably, yearned for ‘action packed movies’ with palpitating and quick plots.
What we looked forward to, was not just the movies but the esoteric ambience of the refectory, when the lights were switched off, and the projector turned on, beaming on the wall or white clothing back drop. Students would whistle endlessly, making cat calls and funny remarks once the lights were turned off. That was the greatest fun of the night. Some courageous mischief makers would hide in obscure corners, skilfully transform their voices in the pitch-dark atmosphere and pour vitriol on any senior student that made life uncomfortable for them. Such tantrums elicited muffled laughter among the junior students.
The film reels and projector were usually set on the table, and the operator, would dutifully operate the machine, praying for a seamless exercise. Unfortunately, due to the antiquated nature of the film reels and projector, there were always hitches while transmitting the movies. Such hitches elicited ear splitting protests of: Operator oo! Operator oo! Operator oo!. Some witty students would wax lyrical: operator maracha ihe oga eme, omara uma na egbu oge. The English version would read something like this: The operator knows the right thing to do but he is deliberately wasting our time. Once the lights were switched on to pinpoint the shadowy faces of the protesters, heavenly silence would descend on the refectory, as though nothing ever transpired. These technical hitches were, particularly glaring when ‘’outdated’’ Chinese (Hong Kong) martial art movies like ‘Snake in the monkey’s shadow,’ staring John Cheung Ng-Long and Wilson Tong Wai-Shing, ‘The drunken master’ staring Jackie Chan and Siu-Tin Yuen or ‘The Five Shaolin Masters’ staring David Chiang, Ti Lung and Chi Kuan Chun, were being transmitted. Both the protagonists and antagonists in the Chinese movies were revered by their acolytes because of their great swordsmanship, but the plots were trite, predictable, and jejune. A movie on the second world war where the German Third Reich, made a futile attempt to colonize the free world and enshrine their inglorious ideology of Nazism, was well received but it was marred by the demon of ‘technical hitches.’
In those days, the ideological divide between North Atlantic Treaty Organisation and the War Saw Pact, prompted analysts to refer to the world as a bipolar world.
Perhaps, one of the most enthralling movies that held us spellbound for hours, and which remained memorable, was entitled: ‘Eat My dust.’ The title was simplistic and uninspiring, but it was a block buster movie, by our own reckoning. The entire refectory was filled to the brim. If the press club were alive to its responsibilities then, it would have captioned the movie as a box office hit in its publication. The tickets were sold out completely. The organisers must have reaped a fortune, having done their homework well. They were very smart, and no one knew the secret of that magical success. From my research on the movie, it was a box office hit in the United States, grossing Five Million U.S Dollars when it was released in 1976. That was a huge sum of money then!
The wizardry that was displayed by the actor, Ron Howard, while driving his specially designed red car to escape from his omnipresent traducers and law enforcement agents was awesome. Not even the legendary Roger Moore or Sean Connery could pull such incredible stunts. Unlike in the past, when the projector malfunctioned, everything worked out perfectly that day like clockwork. We were so excited by the incredible stunts that were expertly pulled by the actor and the producers of the movie that our spasmodic thunderous ovation nearly blew the rooftop away, even as it reverberated in Federal Government Girls College, next door. The accustomed side shows like brazen whistling, cat calls and verbal fusillades were never heard that night. It was as though some unseen forces in the fast-paced movie cast spells on everyone to be well-behaved.
For the rest of the term, the epoch-making movie was a subject of dialogue. Day students became curious and rued missing the ground-breaking movie. Shockingly, what we thought was impossible to perform in real life was literally brought to our doorsteps by an unexpected fellow. Lo and behold, one of the junior students, and our class mate, Major Otuka, a day student then, drove his dad’s car to school, one weekend, and effortlessly re-enacted the skills of the actor of ‘Eat my dust’ on the vast cricket pitch. We were certain that Otuka never watched the movie. No one could explain what motivated him to do what he did that day. We trouped out in awe to behold the strange spectacle being performed behind the steering by a mere teenager. We thought it was a one-off act of showmanship; but it later became almost a norm. Major Otuka, who was probably aged fourteen then or even younger, was neither reprimanded nor punished by the prefects. For exhibiting his supreme talents as a driver, despite being a minor, he was, expectedly glorified and deified by his peers. We were ignorant of the laws then, but deep down in our consciousness, we knew it was wrong for a minor to drive a vehicle. There were insinuations that the prefects were compromised. Whether an official report was lodged to the school authority or not would, however, remain in the realm of conjecture. That inactivity by the compromised prefects emboldened other students, to follow suit. A tall, huge guy, Michael Azuike, of ‘B’ House, who was a year ahead of us, drove his family car to the school compound a couple of weeks later, but he never measured up to the incredible driving skills of Major Otuka. To underscore the fact that the school authority was not aware of these uncensored ‘auto races’ on the cricket pitch, Michael Azuike was made a prefect in 1983. We were never interested in the school’s protocol of discipline, what mattered to us was witnessing the escapades of ‘Eat My Dust,’ live on the cricket pitch.
ERASMUS NDULUE is a UK based climate activist, novelist, poet, and short story writer. He was the former Head of Department of Health, Safety, Environment and Security in an Oil Services company in Lagos, before relocating to UK.
